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Crush Material

by Crush Material

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1.
well i guess in the end it’s me not you who’s at a loss what i mean is i’m still lonely well i guess in the end it’s me not you who had a crush what i mean is i’m still lonely well i guess i’m all freaked because i’m just normally so numb i not used to these feelings and you make me blush without tryin i feel so damn nervous every time you’re near not that it matters you’re not for me and it was you who had it all it was you who had it all im just crush material but there’s nothing between us there’s just something between me you’re just crush material well there’s nothing between us it’s just something between me i’m just crush material we’re just crush material i’m just crush material
2.
thought i’d see you at the indie show last month you say maybe, didn’t show but i still had fun thought i’d see you at the show we played last week you said i’d see you there but i didn’t see and it kinda sucked to feel the butterflies inside turn o mush not that it’s your fault, it’s not your fault but oh, are you sick of me i bet that you’re sick of me i’m sorry that you’re stuck to me i’m sorry that you’re stuck to me finally saw you at a show we played for once you brought a pretty boy i knew you loved and i felt so stupid cause i know you don’t owe me shit but i couldn’t but feel hurt a little bit and you know it’s true there’s a part of me that’s jealous still of you that you’re happy, you look so happy too
3.
High Vibes 03:08
i keep getting messages from the news but i barely care, wish it was a message from you, i’m just a fool it’s not like You’ve every reaches out, it’s just my desire a good distraction from how the world’s on fire, oh thank you helping me make it through id rather worry about if you’re sick of me than worry the world is gonna banish me a liability well you’re so cool it makes me weak i may be socially dead but this anxiety reminds me i’m still living so am i an annoyance, am i out of touch? every time that we talk i worry ive been too much i’m just a fool i really want to know everything you think about i hope that’s not too obsessive, i hope you’re not freaked out i hope you think i’m also cool you’re so pretty and you’re so cool and i’m nothing i’m just a fool am i an annoyance am i uncool? i’m nothing i’m just a fool
4.
Da Da Da 03:38
I’ve overthought what’s never crossed your mind like how long we talked and how you never asked for advice and i laughed it off cause i’m afraid that you’ll see right to my desperate parade how long am i allowed to look at you before it turns shameful, disgusting, what did i do? and i’m afraid of all my feelings all the time a pretty person touches me once and i’ve lost my mind keep in mind i’m untouchable i’m blight burn your skin rip out your eyes i’m untouchable i’m blight i will hide, i’ll hiding, singin’ still i can’t fight this feeling in my chest i wanna scream i wanna throw up i’m obsessed maybe it’s cause i’m just so damn dead inside but the only feeling i can evoke is the shape of your eyes
5.
Split My Lip 03:28
split my lip on a razor i bet you think it’s funny and i do too i’m feeling so ashamed that i never knew cause no one ever taught me split my lip on a razor it’s stinging like i’ll never be quite right why can’t there be a world to hold me? why don’t you hold me? how could you? i’m never gonna get it right so why does it matter? i’m never gonna be alright so why do i care? split my lip on a razor and feeling real dumb how i was thinkin of you i bet the real boys you like would never do at least not these days split my on razor, i hate wanting approval but i need it too i need when the pain bares through me, the boys walk through me, the girls walk through me, you walk through me and i’m not a boy or someone you like so why does it matter i’m not a girl or someone you like why don’t you care i’m not a boy or someone you like i’m just a child i’m just a child as useless as a creature with an open wound i’m not a girl or someone you like why don’t you care take me home take me home i can’t stand another person seein me oh, take me home take me home take me home
6.
Hey how’s it going how are you? I don’t really wanna know I just want to Fill up all of this empty space After the awkwardness of yesterday Where was I, oh yeah, how are things? How’s your boyfriend and those flings I know you have How’s it goin, is it great? I’m sure it is and I don’t want you to think that I care for you at all At all Yeah I don’t wanna think I care about you at all Cause I don’t like you anymore I don’t like the way you talk to me, or don’t I don’t like the way you push me away even if it makes perfect sense, cause you don’t know me and I don’t know shit I don’t see you in my dreams I don’t think of you when you’re not thinking I don’t even leave a trace on your social media accounts So what does that say? And I don’t really want to feel this way forever You know, so empty and lonely And I know things are bad but here’s what i’ve decided now And i don’t really care what makes you smile Youre just another figment of my mind And I’ve been really sick and trying to cope with all this and you You were just a part of it But you don’t have to be a part of it I I I promise
7.
Bitter 02:36
I guess I’m over you right now I only think of you when I’m down I don’t think that you’re the one for me Not sure I believe in any thing I’m not sayin that I’m bitter I’m not saying that I’m anything alright So how do you feel about me now? Do you think of me at all You’re really busy so probably not It’s not like I’ve been fucked by this for months

about

Recorded and mixed in The Closet by Mari Campos
Mastered at Earth Tone Studios by Patrick Hills
Album Art by Jackson Faine with photography by Gretchen Fitzgibbon

Crush Material is:
Stevie - Guitar, Vocals
Liv - Guitar, Backing Vocals
Eliot - Bass
Terri - Drums

credits

released August 27, 2019

Thanks to Gretchen Fitzgibbon, Mari Campos, Corina Seligman, Alex Botkin & Lavasocks Records, Patrick Hills, Stevie's muse(s) [crush redacted], Jamie Lee Curtis, Lindsay Lohan and Pink Slip, Burrito Express, Nikko's 24 Hour Diner, Martha Stewart, Rory and Lorelai Gilmore, Britney Spears, Rum Ham, 924 Gilman Street & Gilman volunteers, all of our crushes that have ended in Shakespearean tragedy or yearning, and YOU (our latest crush)!

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Crush Material Oakland, California

queer power pop from Oakland, CA !

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